How To Make No Mistake When Choosing
Clothes Or... Wife.
Searching a life partner on dating sites, we
often find ourselves in the same position as
a buyer in a huge store with a large
assortment. We face one and the same
problem there - the problem of choice. Or in
other words - the problem of clarity of
purpose. If the objective is quite clear, that is
half the success. The likelihood of a good
choice in this case is 50/50. And if the
process of selection will be also correct,
then the full success is guaranteed. There is
an easy way (or tool) by means of which it is
easy to determine the correctness of your
choice, that you will never regret later. The
tool is always "on hand" and it does not
This is your innate intuition (by the other
definitions - soul). Each of us had used it
many times in the life, being not always
aware of this...
The clearest and simplest example, as well the training of the ability to define your goals at the
same time is finding the necessary clothing for you. Do please recall, there have been cases where
you bought seems to be the appropriate thing, but later it turns out that you stop like it or it is not
suitable, or has a defect. And it had happened that you have seen something, bought it immediately
without hesitation and are happy with it for today. The difference between those things is that one of
them is someone's else, and the second one is yours.
The first thing that seemed appealing to you, was intended for another person, but not for you.
Perhaps you saw it on a friend or a mannequin. If the thing looks good on the other man, it yet does
not mean that it will go for you. And this is not your weakness but your dignity. It is very bad to be a
mannequin, on which everything looks good. It is not the generally beauty makes the strong
impression but the stressed well individuality.
I aware that all of this you know very well without me. However you go shopping for a long time and
agonize, not knowing what to buy. Knowledge of styles, fashion sense, even a good taste does not
help you. After long searches, you are still not entirely satisfied with the acquired thing. In order to
always find exactly what you need you have to learn how to distinguish your goods from someone's
else ones. How is it done? You will not believe how simple is it!
First, never torture yourself with the problem of choice. Since you are clearly in violation of the
balance. The more you tighten on this, the worse the result will be. You do not need to examine
things and analyze their advantages and disadvantages for a long time. The reason should not
participate in process of choice because the mind and it's thoughts is not YOU, but the swoop from
the influence of "the commonly established views", from advertising finally. Just go and see like at
the exhibition, nothing thinking.
Second, you have to be clear about yourself in general terms, what would you like to buy. It is not
necessarily to represent the details. The only description is to be the type of clothing. For example,
if you need a coat, just put a goal to choose a coat, and no more extra conditions. Let your soul
choose - it is much closer to what YOU actually ARE. It will not miss the slightest detail and
always tell you in time on your thing. You will learn about it as soon as among the many things you
will see and rather feel the only one that inspires you a special liking.
Once again I repeat, you do not need to analyze why do you like the thing. You just like it and you
can say about it "this is the right thing I need". You will buy it without thinking.
Even if you're looking for it for a long time and you can not find it, no doubt, there is your thing in a
some store. If there is not in the third one, then in the tenth store you can find it. It patiently waits
for you so that you also be patient, do not thrash about, do not torture yourself with a doubt and do
not reproach yourself. And to make the confidence absolute, I'll reveal the secret of distinguisher
between other's thing and yours one. It is as easy as well.
As I have said, during the selection process, you should not think about the benefits and
disadvantages of the thing. But the moment when you must tell the seller your "Yes" or "No" has
come. At this time you are very sweet sleeping, even if you think that this is not the case. Your
sleep is particularly strong if there are either seller or your friend beside that tells you about the
While you are deciding, your mind only is working. It analyzes the advantages and disadvantages,
it builds it's own concept and makes it soundly and persuasively, but at the same time it listens to
the views of others. The mind is so absorbed into the process, that it really does not pay attention
to the feelings of the soul. In this sense, the mind is firmly sleeping.
Let it be, do not disturb it until it takes action. And now the decision is made. Attention! At this
point, don't listen to anybody, wake up and be aware of: what are the feelings you had when the
decision was taken? Was it a condition of mental comfort, or vice versa? The state of mental
comfort will show you the attitude of the soul to decision of your mind.
Mental comfort, as you know, can not give you unambiguous answer. The soul does not always
knows exactly what it wants and can also vary. If you liked the thing at first sight, and you soon felt
it, then the soul said "yes". But afterwards the mind turns on and starts to analyze and justify the
choice. If as a result of the analysis your mind also said "yes", it means that the thing is yours. If
you liked the thing not at first sight, but as a result of rational justification, then you should
particularly pay attention to the slightest spiritual discomfort. The soul has a remarkable feature -
sometimes it does not always know exactly what it wants, but (Attention!), it always knows
exactly what it does not want to! Herein lies the secret of the correct choice.
If you hesitate, if anything in this thing you have is mild anxiety or discomfort, if light shade of doubt
or oppression runs - this is not your thing. The mind will start to persuade you and colorfully to
paint all the dignities. If you caught yourself that you are coaxing yourself, trying to convince you
that this has both good shape and size as well - you can immediately without regret reject this thing
- it is someone's else but not yours.
Unequivocal selection criterion is in one simple phrase: if you have to coax yourself, the thing is
someone's else. Do know it: if the thing is yours, you do not have to coax yourself.
And finally, whether in the selection process you should listen to the views of others? I think not. No
one except you, will be able to choose your thing. If you liked it unconditionally, you can be
absolutely sure that when others will see it from you, they come into raptures.
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In conclusion, let's get back to love affairs, to the question of choosing a wife. There is an ancient
Eastern parable. At a Bazaar a dervish (peripatetic sage) is siting. Many people apply to him for
solving their life problems, and he helps everyone with wise advice. A richly dressed young man
approaches, puts a coin in a bowl for donations, and respectfully askes.
- Oh, wise! I really need your advice.
- What's your question?
- The fact is that I am in love. I like a very good and beautiful girl from a respected family and would
like to marry her. Give me advice dear, should I marry her or not?
- Do not marry her!
- If you really wanted to marry her, you would not ask anybody.
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