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 Who Knows Why The Stranger Is Winking?!
On many dating sites, including our own, there is every possibility to
show interest in a person whom you find attractive. It's possible "to
wink", to send a virtual postcard, to "surprise", to greet him or her
with an icebreaker or to add him or her to your friends' list or your
'favorites' folder, about which the person will be immediately
informed. Even a language barrier is not a hindrance.
People regard this kind of advances differently. A lot of them take it
quite sceptically considering all this stuff a sign of idle indifference.
Some of them would even state it in their forms that they
An elderly man playfully winks
"do not answer winking". They are convinced that it is possible to express interest
only by writing a long personal letter. However, is it true?
Now imagine not virtual, but a real situation. How would you feel if a stranger
suddenly stopped you in the middle of the street or in a bus and like mad started to
tell you about his life and his work? I expect you would be totally confused or
bewildered making fruitless attempts to recall where and when you had met this
person before. Fortunately, people rarely behave in such a manner.
Do you recollect how random encounters, which can sometimes determine your entire
life, usually occur? Trying to display his consideration, a person will give special
signals through gestures, facial expressions or looks. If you have no desire to
encourage him or her, you can simply let these signals "go unnoticed" or, if you do
find the person interesting and handsome, answer him or her properly. In fact, by
giving such a response you let your communication go ahead suggesting some
prospects for a dialogue, forming an acquaintance or even something more
meaningful. However, there is no special need to expect the initiative from the others
as you can send suchlike signals by yourself, which neither binds you to anything, nor
contradicts any ethical standards.
Now, let's return to making virtual acquaintances. Although, divided by thousands of
miles we cannot demonstrate our interest with facial expressions or gestures, we are
able to send an electronic "wink", a virtual postcard or 'surprise' or include the person
into our friends' list and add him or her into the "favorites' folder. Moreover, you can
as well send him or her a personal page link. Thus, these advances become not only
expressions of sympathy and interest but an invitation to look at the photographs
and to read the profile.
If you receive a little virtual signal of affection, do not take exception to the person
for being too lazy to write a letter. All the things he or she wanted the people to
know about him or her are already in the profile, but yet the person is not sure if you
are the one to get to know something more personal. You should be glad that among
the thousands of other girls and men the person paid attention to you in particular.
Visit his or her page. If you find the person attractive, you can begin a dialogue and
learn more about each other. Otherwise, if he or she is not your prince charming or
"lady green sleeves", you should just thank him or her politely for showing
consideration in you.
Using virtual signs of attention has one more advantage specifically concerning with
international relationships. Girls from Russia and other countries of Eastern Europe
sometimes feel embarrassed about being the first person to show initiative in making
contact, regarding this as a sign of being accessible and too easy. According to the
traditions, they should await for the man to show initiative. However, in some
Western countries a display of initiative from the man's side can be interpreted as
tactlessness and even sexual advance. As a result both girls and men fall into a state
of passive expectation, feeling uneasy about making the first step in acquaintance
and writing the letter to a person they like. The 'winks' that engage in no liabilities,
'surprises' and other small virtual signals of attention and affection help to overcome
this barrier and display one's sympathy for a stranger.
Don't be shy to send a "wink" while exploring the members' files. You can easily send
small messages to everyone who arouses your interest. It costs nothing to you, but
the receivers will be pleased with it. You also should not get upset if some of your
winks get no response. After all, all these actions of yours just help to charge the
site with positive energy, which will undoubtedly return to you.
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